Healthy Autonomy

Association for Promoting Healthy Autonomy e.V.

Fathers and Symbiosis Trauma

For fathers, the birth of a child brings profound changes in the couples relationship. Alienation of the female partner is often the trigger for the relationship conflict. Often fathers develop domestic absenteeism and a disturbed closeness to the child justified by reasons of supply, such as work. Further escalations can arise by psycological and physical violence or different forms of dependency. Sentences like: “I never knew him like that“ are common.

Conversations should explain all that, but cannot achieve a perceived improvement. Through the constellation of the intention the underlying reasons appear. For the male, the mother-child-bonding processes touch the feelings of loneliness and rejection to his own mother. The traumatisation of his love to himself because he was not loved enough.

The feelings of retraumatisation activate his trauma survival strategies, leading to his behaviour. The control of the feelings does not allow a healthy relationship to the partner and child any more, which results in a depressive and destructive survival attitude that extends to the family relationship.

Through constellations the entanglement and the consequences of the symbiosis trauma of the father can be processed. Becoming aware results in clearing processes whereby emotions for the female partner and the child become possible.
There is the opportunity for one constellation.



detlev_blechnerDetlev Blechner, born 1960, father of one daughter
Diploma in social sciences.
Since 28 years coach for autonomy-promoting life- and work issues, thereof 20 in the area of psychological coaching.
Since 2009 regular training at IGTV/Birgit Assel and seminars with Prof. Franz Ruppert.
Furtheron I am a free lecturer at universities, colleges and academies.


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